The Elias forum: ďExperience is your best teacher.Ē










<  notice, relax, and do not judge and do not compare  >

DANNY: ďI know Iíve been on my hamster wheel for a long time. I know I have conflicts, depression, core beliefs that I havenít neutralized and so on and so forth, and Iíve practiced a great degree of separation. I was just wondering if I could just sit back and listen to you give me what Iíd call an overview of my life and maybe point out certain beliefs or fears that need to be neutralized. (Pause)

ELIAS: Let me inquire of you, what do you view as your most strongly expressed and most frequently expressed experience or automatic response?

DANNY: I guess one of them would be I know I have a lot of anger within me. But I donít necessarily show it to a lot of people.

ELIAS: Very well.

Now; express to myself, what do you view as your trigger in association with anger?

DANNY: I guess being maybe misunderstood, misunderstood in my communications possibly, or something along those lines.

ELIAS: Very well.

Now; in assessing that as your trigger, what do you view that YOU generate that creates this expression of misunderstanding within other individuals?

DANNY: Maybe possibly that Iíve given them mixed communications. Thatís possible.

ELIAS: And in these moments...

DANNY: And also that I donít take much of a stand on many things.

ELIAS: And in these moments, do you express an objective awareness of the type of communication that you are expressing to other individuals?

DANNY: No, most of the time Iíd say I just take a calm approach and accept what other people express to me, even though I might disagree with it secretly.

ELIAS: And may you attempt to assess what is your fear?

DANNY: In a way, Iíve told myself Ė but I donít think itís the complete truth Ė that it goes back to my early years, you know, the need to be liked by many people, to be accepted by many, that kind of deal.

ELIAS: I am understanding. But in this, what are you actually generating?

DANNY: Sort of like a falsehood, because not everybodyís going to love everybody.

ELIAS: Correct, but this is not the point. You are correct that you are expressing a falsehood, but not precisely in relation to the expression that everyone shall or shall not love everyone else. In this, what you are generating is a falsehood to yourself, for you are seeking approval outside of yourself and you are not expressing your own value.

DANNY: Who I am.

ELIAS: Correct. Or paying attention to your choices, your freedom and what YOU want, and how to be expressing YOUR preferences, and therefore expressing yourself genuinely. But in this, the first step, so to speak, is to be recognizing yourself and moving yourself into an expression of value and acceptance.

This is what generates this expression of anger within you. Not necessarily that other individuals are misunderstanding you, but that you are denying your own expressions and stifling your choices and your freedom to be falsely accommodating of other individuals in your seeking of approval. But you do not generate genuine approval from other individuals, for you are not expressing this within yourself.

Now; I am in agreement with your assessment that this has been being expressed for many years within your focus, and your trap, so to speak, is your perception Ė which creates your reality Ė of continuing to be a victim of your childhood.

DANNY: Yes. Whew! Yes, indeed. I guess itís just gonna take practice and communicating my inner stuff, right, to other people? That kind of a thing?

ELIAS: Do not overwhelm yourself, my friend, in generating this type of thought process. For in your terms, this is much too large presently for you to be actually implementing. Allow yourself to relax and allow yourself to begin acknowledging yourself individually and moving into expressions of acceptance of yourself.

Now; the manner in which you may begin this type of action is to be, within your day, paying attention to what you are actually doing, paying attention to what you are expressing to yourself in emotional communications. Even if you are not quite interpreting what the communication IS, merely the noticing of the signal initially is adequate. For there are many expressions within yourself that you are unfamiliar with paying attention to, and this is the reason that you continue to reinforce this familiar behavior in camouflaging yourself. But you are not merely camouflaging yourself to other individuals; you are quite effectively camouflaging yourself to yourself.

In this, as you allow yourself to pay attention within your day to what you are DOING and what you are feeling Ė regardless of how unimportant it appears in the moment Ė as you engage that action, intentionally express to yourself not to judge what you are doing. If you are experiencing a depression within a moment, merely notice what you are feeling. Do not attempt to force energy to change that feeling but rather merely notice, acknowledge that this is what you are generating in this moment and not judge it. Whatever you are actually doing in action, notice and relax, and do not judge and do not compare.

This in itself as an initial exercise may be quite challenging, and you may be incorporating some practice in this type of action. But I may express to you quite definitely, it shall be very influencing and beneficial to you, for you have become very accustomed to being a victim. This is a manner in which you may interrupt that familiarity and that continuous reinforcement within yourself, and therefore loosen your attention and allow yourself more of a flexibility with your attention. Therefore, once expressing more flexibility with the movement of your attention, you may begin to recognize more of your choices.

You express a tremendous tightness in your energy, my friend. In this tightness, you are holding to your energy in an expression of protection of yourself. But in actuality you are generating your own prison, are you not?

DANNY: Yes, yes.

ELIAS: Therefore, offer yourself the key to your own lock and allow yourself to relax within yourself, recognizing that there is no outside expression that may be offered by any individual that you need to be expressing protection from, for no other individual may create for you ANY expression within your reality unless you express it yourself.

Another individual may express an intention to be hurtful, but the reality of the situation Ė and it is QUITE real Ė is that regardless of any other individualís intention, it may not penetrate your energy field unless you allow it. Even if you allow it, YOU configure that energy. Therefore, if you are expressing hurtfulness, it is not being generated by another individual. It is an expression which is being generated within you in relation to some choice that you are denying yourself.

DANNY: Oh, boy. I have a lot of work to do!

ELIAS: And we incorporate much time and much energy! Therefore, it matters not! (Laughs)

DANNY: I hope I can one day look back at this and laugh real hard.

ELIAS: And you can!

DANNY: In a way, I can. Based on the information that youíve given out, I can, in a way. I can.

ELIAS: You incorporate a tremendous potential, my friend. You also incorporate a tremendous capacity for appreciation if you allow yourself. But you camouflage that appreciation with anger.

DANNY: So does a lot of my stuff go back to the self-trust and the self-acceptance things?

ELIAS: Quite!

DANNY: Okay Ė just making sure. (Elias laughs) Iíve heard you say that many a time!

ELIAS: Be remembering what I have expressed in relation to your parent. As you contemplate that information, offer yourself permission to not generate similar expression. You are quite a worthy individual and worthy of much more than anger, which may be related to guilt yourself.

DANNY: I donít know. I know you talk about probabilities and so on and so forth, but before I was born I chose the adoption process, is that correct? Is that how it works?

ELIAS: Not necessarily. That is a choice that is created in the moment.

DANNY: Oh. But I did choose my birth parents?


DANNY: And I did choose to be in a private foster home for a short while?


DANNY: And then I chose to be adopted by the parents who adopted me?

ELIAS: Yes. These have been your choices, and they are purposeful, for they have offered you information. And you have generated experiences that...

DANNY: Iíll come home with some depth, thatís for sure!

ELIAS: (Laughs) And in these experiences, you have offered yourself information. NOW what you are engaging is unraveling that information.

DANNY: Is there anything else that you would like to tell me or share with me that I am not aware of, as far as you can see?

ELIAS: Ha ha ha! This is quite a large question, is it not?

DANNY: Oh, you mean you could go on forever!

ELIAS: (Laughs) Let me express to you, my friend, you are not alone. There are many expressions that I view within all of you that you are not aware of yet!

DANNY: I see in the transcripts a lot of people talking about being affected by the shift. I donít know, I feel the same. Is it because I donít plug into the mass belief system that much that I am less affected by it, or is it because Iím on my hamster wheel? I donít know what to say. Can you understand what Iím saying?

ELIAS: I understand what you are expressing.

Now; it is not necessarily that you are not moving with this shift or that you are not affected, for you are. But some individuals are experiencing an affectingness that may be disturbing or conflicting to them and other individuals are not.

With you individually, your energy is being held so very tightly to yourself, as I have expressed, in this action of protection, that you are not expressing an openness in relation to yourself with regard to this shift in consciousness. You ARE moving within it and you ARE expressing a widening of your awareness, as are all other individuals within your physical reality, and you ARE offering yourself information in relation to that movement. But your movement now is to be focusing your attention upon you and becoming familiar with you.

DANNY: And my expressions.

ELIAS: Correct. And your choices, familiarizing yourself with what you actually do within your experiences within your day and therefore offering yourself information concerning what influences what you do, which beliefs are influencing what you generate in action. You may find it interesting, my friend, to be noticing even within one day how many actions you incorporate that are underlyingly motivated by the belief of protection.

DANNY: Iíll keep that in mind Ė a lot of noticing of my reasons behind what I do.

ELIAS: Correct.

DANNY: Noticing my intellect, noticing my emotional stuff especially.

ELIAS: Yes. But pay attention to the actions that you incorporate also.

DANNY: That equates to whatever Iím thinking about.

ELIAS: Not necessarily, for many of the actions that you incorporate within your day require no thought. They are automatic responses and in your estimation are insignificant and unimportant. They are merely routine.

DANNY: Right, theyíve become routine, yes.

ELIAS: Correct.

DANNY: I see what youíre saying.

One of the biggest problems Iíve had all my life is trying to find something that would really hold my interest. I was just wondering, are there areas that I would really enjoy, so to speak?

ELIAS: This information holds your interest.

DANNY: Oh, very much! (Elias chuckles) Very much.

ELIAS: NOW attempt to be implementing it!

DANNY: Yes, practice what you preach!

ELIAS: This shall hold your attention quite efficiently. (Laughing)

DANNY: Yeah, what youíve talked about today Ė whew! Well, all I can say is the next time I speak to you, I want to report back some information to you, so to speak.

ELIAS: And I shall be anticipating listening and receiving your report, so to speak! Ha ha ha!Ē [session 1205, December 09, 2002]

Digests Ė see also: | accepting self | attention (doing and choosing) | avenues of communication | choices/agreements | focus; an overview | hamster wheel | information | noticing self | objective/subjective awareness | probabilities | shift in consciousness | triggers | widening awareness | victims/perpetrators |

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