The Elias forum: ďExperience is your best teacher.Ē










<  pay attention to self in the moment  >

MARJE: ďI think the biggest thing is trying to work on the concept that we create everything and specifically dis-ease, trying to figure out if all of these diseases and pain that I have created in my life in the last couple of years, one right after the other, if theyíve all been for the same pay-off or if each time itís been for some different reason. At this point, I donít know where to begin working, if that makes any sense.

ELIAS: I am understanding. Although in relation to your comment of not knowing where to begin, I may express to you that the beginning is NOW.

MARJE: Absolutely.

ELIAS: Therefore, let me express to you, understanding what you have generated in the past is not always an efficient manner for addressing to the present. For in actuality, although this is the method which is accepted en masse and reinforced through psychological beliefs, in actuality what you generate in this type of method is to be reinforcing your associations with past experiences as absolutes, which reinforces solidifying certain expressions that are automatic responses in an association with absolutes in the present and also reinforces projecting anticipation concerning the future. Are you understanding thus far?

MARJE: Somewhat.

ELIAS: As an example, an individual may create an experience of dis-ease in one moment and may generate that physical affectingness in association with a particular communication that they are offering to themselves.

We may incorporate an example of breathing. The individual may constrict their breathing in a particular time framework, and in that physical affectingness they may be communicating to themselves through this action that they are restricting their allowance of their expression in that particular moment, and they reflect to themselves this restriction of their energy through the creation of this physical affectingness.

Now; the individual may incorporate this same action of constriction of breath, and they may in another time framework be generating this action as a communication of the same action of restriction but perhaps in a different area. In one moment, they may be restricting of their expression outwardly; in another area, they may be restricting of their movement or their energy or their understanding or their noticing, but the action continues to be the same.

Now; as the individual recognizes and identifies that they create this action of constriction of their breath and they associate that with restricting of their expression in any manner, the action of the physical constriction of breath, the experience, becomes an absolute. Therefore, there is an automatic association.

Now; in your VAST creativity, you may choose to be incorporating the constriction of breath, in a manner of speaking, for an entirely different reason at one point; but you do not offer yourself clear or accurate information for you have already created an automatic association with this particular physical affectingness.

MARJE: So thatís where Iím going with my low back and my legs, is Iím restricting the flow of energy and creating pain, but Iím not aware of the message that Iím trying to give myself as to why Iím creating this restriction.

ELIAS: No. This was an example of automatic associations concerning past experiences and how they are generated into absolutes in present associations and projection into future anticipation.

In actuality, what you are creating in association with this physical affectingness that you generate is a signal, which is in actuality the situation with all physical dis-ease. It is an avenue of communication to yourself, and in this communication what you are expressing to yourself is the identification of a lack of allowance and supportiveness to self. You are not constricting energy. You are focusing and directing energy to a particular physical expression within your physical body consciousness and creating this painfulness as a signal concerning your lack of supportiveness and allowance to self.

MARJE: So as I (sigh) work on supporting myself and allowing myself to be in the state that Iím in, I can ease the pain that Iím experiencing?


MARJE: And choose to create a comfort zone instead of so much pain?

ELIAS: Correct, by allowing yourself to focus your attention upon self rather than projecting your attention outwardly and attempting to be offering to other individuals what you want to be expressing within self.

MARJE: Okay, that relieves me somewhat, because I was fearful that my disease and my pain was some sort of a pay-off within the relationship that I was involved in...


MARJE: ...and what youíre telling me is that, no, in actuality it is the signaling to myself to pay attention to self and to allow myself to be supportive of self...

ELIAS: Correct.

MARJE: ...and thusly not experience the pain because I wonít need that signal. Iíll be working on myself in another manner.

ELIAS: Correct.

MARJE: It has nothing to do with the relationship, it has to do with...

ELIAS: Ahhh! I am not expressing this to you! I may express to you...

MARJE: Well, it has to do the relationship in the sense that I was focusing outward and into the relationship instead of self.


MARJE: But it didnít have anything per se to do with the relationship. It was just not dealing with self.


MARJE: Okay, that makes sense.

ELIAS: And continues, for you continue to focus your attention outwardly in relation to other individuals. You have merely moved your attention from one individual to another individual.

MARJE: And I do that often...

ELIAS: I am aware.

MARJE: ...and so I create a great deal of pain, and I am really tired of being in pain.


MARJE: It weighs heavy.

ELIAS: (Gently) And perhaps you shall allow yourself to be moving your attention to you and therefore discontinue creating this signal, for it shall be unnecessary. Perhaps you shall offer yourself a new expression of freedom.

MARJE: I have tried affirmations. Iíve tried to tell myself what I choose and to focus on those things, and have had momentary or fleeting moments of relief and freedom, but can instantly at any moment go right back into the pain and right back into not focusing on me. And that I can do in a regular workday, let alone in any given relationship.

ELIAS: But in generating this painfulness, you do pay attention to some aspect of yourself, do you not?

MARJE: Oh, itíll bring me right back, yes! (Elias chuckles) Right back, so then I have to ask myself what is the underlying message from the signal, each and every time.

ELIAS: Temporarily, to the point that you become familiar with yourself and with the action of holding your attention upon you.

MARJE: You make that sound so easy! (Laughing)

ELIAS: Ha ha ha ha ha! Let me express to you, my friend, in this you may offer yourself a method of practicing in which you allow yourself in any particular moment in your interactions with other individuals to turn your attention, in a manner of speaking, away from the expression of the other individual.

You may generate this exercise in any moment. It need not be expressed merely in moments of conflict. But within any moment allow yourself a practice exercise in which, merely incorporating a few moments within your time framework, you discontinue paying attention to the other individual and allow yourself to move your attention to you and explore in that moment what YOU are generating inwardly, whether you are offering yourself a communication through emotion, whether you are generating an expression of calm, whether you are generating an expression of tension within your physical muscles, how you are perceiving the interaction which is occurring. What is your physical body expressing?

You may in actuality create this practice exercise within any moment, in any situation, in any interaction with any individual, and objectively the other individual shall not incorporate an awareness of what you are creating, for you may appear to be continuing the interaction with the other individual. In actuality you are momentarily allowing yourself an awareness of what YOU are generating in that particular interaction.

Now; if you are allowing yourself to be generating this practice exercise merely momentarily, you may become aware of the ease in creating this action. It shall also validate within you your actual ability to be intentionally objectively moving your attention, and shall reinforce your trust within your ability to be creating that action. Recognizing where an individualís attention is directed is in actuality quite unfamiliar. For the most part, individuals associate their attention with thinking. Therefore, moving their attention is also associated with changing thoughts, and this is not the expression of attention.

Therefore, it is beneficial to allow yourself these types of exercises to familiarize yourself with attention itself and that you do incorporate the ability to move your attention intentionally and continue to be interactive with other individuals. You may surprise yourself in the difference of expression which is created merely through the action of moving your attention.

MARJE: This I will definitely have to work on! (Elias laughs) I will put it into practice, and practice until it becomes second nature.

ELIAS: Ah! Ha ha ha! And this is the creation of familiarity! Ha ha ha!

MARJE: Yes, yes!

Which brings me to the point, because I know with all of the transcripts Iíve been reading and everything else, and the difference between the fact that emotion is a communication and not defining the emotion itself but trying to define what the communication is, Iíve been so ANGRY and VERY emotional ... I mean (sigh) WAVES of emotion, where theyíre in extremes from great anger to on the verge of tears at the blink of an eye, and obviously it all comes back to not paying attention to self. I have to wonder if thereís just something in particular that I am missing here.

ELIAS: Anger is an extreme...

MARJE: And Iím angry often.

ELIAS: Anger is a signal which contains the message that you are not allowing yourself choice, period Ė that you are, in that moment, expressing to yourself that you incorporate NO choice.

MARJE: And I project that outwardly.

ELIAS: Correct.

MARJE: So in other words, my anger projected outwardly makes other people feel as if they have caused me not to have choices, and yet itís me that has created this belief that I have no choice.

ELIAS: Correct, although I may express to you, what you are generating outwardly is also your creation. You are creating the other individuals through your perception as a reflection to yourself. In the moments that you are expressing this anger within self, this lack of choice in extreme within self, you project that energy outwardly and you create these manifestations through your perception of other individuals reflecting this anger to you.

MARJE: Well, Iíve had a lot of years of practice at that! (Elias chuckles) Itís caused a great deal of conflict.

ELIAS: In the moments that you are expressing this signal of anger, you may also incorporate this practice exercise and allow yourself a momentary stop-point in which you shift your attention to you and merely recognize that you are expressing to yourself that you incorporate no choice.

I may express to you, my friend, merely this action that you may consider to be brief and small, and perhaps even incomplete, shall allow you to move your attention and to express to yourself that you do incorporate choice.

In this one action you may in actuality surprise yourself once again in how quickly you shall offer to yourself, merely in the act of noticing, a recognition of specific choices. Merely the action of noticing your communication to yourself that you are expressing to yourself that you hold no choice, this noticing in itself many times generates an immediate opening for response to yourself to recognize that you do incorporate choices and you may offer yourself specific identifications of some of your choices.

MARJE: That just felt like a dťjŗ vu moment! (Elias chuckles) As if Iíve heard you say this to me before and it didnít register! (Both laugh)

But Iíve also been so extreme with emotions that I start to cry immediately, and in my wanting to always be strong, I canít stand the emotional me. I have no tolerance.

ELIAS: Ah, and I may express to you that the more you struggle and the more intensely you FORCE your energy AGAINST your communications, the STRONGER your communications become.Ē [session 966, November 24, 2001]

Digests Ė see also: | absolutes | attention (doing and choosing) | choices/agreements | dis-ease and healing | information | noticing self | perception | relationships | stop-points | trusting self | you create your reality |

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