The Elias forum: “Experience is your best teacher.”










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BOBBI: “... I’m just going to start out talking to you about time, not having enough time. I was talking to Mary a little bit about that. Lately it seems like I am just really, really constrained in my time, not able to get done all that I would like to do or that I feel like I have to do or that I choose to do, even. I’m aware of a few things that are going on with that, how I’m creating that, but I would just like to get your comments about it.

ELIAS: (Chuckles) And is this not obvious to you, Jale [Bobbi], in what you are generating, and are you genuinely requiring the response from myself to be paying attention to you? Ha ha ha!

BOBBI: Well, no. No, and that’s true, if I pay attention to me.

ELIAS: Or rather experiment with yourself in noticing how much of your time you are occupying in not paying attention to you. This may be quite enlightening in offering yourself information in relation to how you may be paying attention to you. For many times you are not recognizing that you are not paying attention to yourself, for you are not noticing where your attention is.

BOBBI: My attention is pretty scattered, it’s true, lately. It’s all over the place! (Elias laughs)

ELIAS: Now; in offering yourself a time framework in which you allow yourself to notice all of the time frameworks in which your attention is turned outside of yourself and you are concerning yourself with other individuals, or even with yourself but outside of yourself in relation to expectations that you place upon yourself concerning what you MUST do rather than what you want, you may recognize how you are occupying much of your time. This shall allow you a new recognition of how you may choose to incorporate the movements and the actions that you want, and you shall incorporate enough time.

BOBBI: (Sighs) It has been difficult balancing that. (Elias chuckles) I do let other people’s expectations get to me quite a bit, and I’m attempting to work that all out – not successfully all the time.

ELIAS: Step through this one day, and express to me an account of this day from the moment of your awakening this day. What have been your activities?

BOBBI: I got up; I made coffee and some breakfast for my husband and made his lunch; I cleaned up the kitchen. Then he left for work and I came in to the computer and was working on transcripts this morning. (1) Then I figured I had better get dressed because maybe the plumber was coming later after I spoke to you, so I got ready. I did play with the cat for a while and made the bed. My daughter got up, so I went out and I talked to her for a while, and then I came in and called Mary.

ELIAS: Now; in all of that time framework, did you allow yourself any moments, other than interacting with your feline, in which you were aware of what you wanted to express or do in the moment?

BOBBI: No. I would have to say I was pretty much on my usual automatic pilot throughout the morning. I have a certain schedule, a certain list of things that I accomplish during the day at a certain time.

ELIAS: Correct. Therefore, other than the moments in which you allowed yourself playfulness with your creature and your telephone call in association with Michael [Mary] and myself, you have been unaware of what YOU want in the moment and are not paying attention to you and not paying attention to your choices and not paying attention to your communications in association with your choices.

This is an example of automatic responses, and automatic responses, as I have expressed many times, are precisely that, automatic, requiring no thought and no attention to self and what you are creating or how you are creating within your reality. Automatic responses are extremely limiting, and thusly you question at the end of your day, what has happened to all of your time? What have you allowed yourself to accomplish? What have you allowed as an offering of your own freedom to yourself? And the question lies in viewing all of the automatic responses that you generate throughout each of your days and how much of your time framework is incorporated in not paying attention.

You arise and you serve breakfast and coffee, which is an automatic response. Therefore, you are choosing an automatic response, which is limiting, and you are not familiarizing yourself with you. Do you want to be serving breakfast in this moment, and coffee? Or is there another action that you want to be incorporating in that moment? Do you want to be fluffing the bed, or do you want to be incorporating quietness? Do you want to be interactive with your daughter for one hour, or is your want a different action? And is the action motivated in association with a sense of obligation, right behavior, expectations, or is the action motivated through a genuine want?

BOBBI: A lot of the incidental choices that I make through the day I feel are based on some larger choices that I’ve made previously, as far as other things that I want to do. I choose not to have a regular office job. In that, I feel that there are things around the house then that I should be doing. I chose to do the transcripts, which I enjoy very much, but I do feel that since I chose to do that I should be doing it on a regular basis and accomplishing that. I’ve chosen, instead of having a job, to run my little part-time business, but in order to make that go I need to get into the kitchen and spend several hours a day making those horse treats. So I feel that I’ve made choices, but somehow those choices are sometimes restricting.

ELIAS: Listen to what you are expressing, for all of what you are expressing is associated with your beliefs concerning your choices and how your choices are associated with exchange in relation to other individuals and all of the ‘shoulds’ that accompany that belief concerning exchange.

BOBBI: I know that’s a big part of it. I know part of my excessive busyness and concern with objective output is a way to sort of justify my existence, I suppose.

ELIAS: Correct.

BOBBI: ‘What is my output’ is quite close to ‘what is my worth.’ I realize that is a belief that’s going on. I haven’t come to grips with it, obviously.

ELIAS: You are correct, for you are valuable and worthy merely for the reason that you are, and this needs not be justified in an expression of exchange. ‘If this individual, my partner, is incorporating employment and I am choosing not to be engaging that type of activity, as we are partners I must be offering an outward exchange to match energy to prove my worthiness.’

BOBBI: Yeah, I have that belief! (Elias chuckles) And I guess he has that belief also, which is another motivating factor for me.

ELIAS: Ah! But the belief that he expresses is of no concern. I may not emphasize to you strongly enough the actual reality of the power of perception and how this actually physically alters reality, physical reality, even other individuals, for you are creating them. Therefore, it genuinely matters not what the other individual expresses as their beliefs, for in offering yourself freedom and an acceptance and trust of you and allowing yourself to freely express what you want without limitation, you alter your perception and therefore alter the response of the other individual. (Pause)

But this concept you do not quite incorporate into your beliefs yet! (Laughs)

BOBBI: Can you tell? (Laughs) Yeah, I know! (Elias laughs) I hear you, but I haven’t gotten to that point of really putting it into action, I guess.

ELIAS: In your terms, as you do measure certain actions and certain choices as being larger or smaller, allow yourself to experiment. Incorporate one week of your time framework, and in that one week, in what you perceive to be small expressions, experiment and allow yourself the freedom to actually choose in a moment what you want and incorporate a different action.

BOBBI: For a whole week, huh? (Laughs)

ELIAS: Yes, and in this exercise you may allow yourself to objectively view how you alter your perception.

BOBBI: Okay, I will do it. (Elias chuckles) I’ll give that a try.” [session 1124, July 05, 2002]

End Notes:

(1) Paul's note: Bobbi is the lead transcriber of the Elias transcripts, a job she took over recently after Vicki Pendley's untimely passing on December 08, 2001.

Library: find out more about Vicki's passing.

Digests – see also: | attention (doing and choosing) | avenues communication | belief systems; an overview | choices/agreements | information | noticing self | objective/subjective awareness | perception | you create your reality |

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